The ” grip of death ” is when a man grips his penis so hard during masturbation that vaginal intercourse no longer stimulates him to the point of climax.
If you are suffering from “retarded ejaculation” or “delayed ejaculation”, the good news is that it's almost entirely psychological – the nerve endings on your penis are intact and you're just having a “mental block” preventing you from “letting go “He said.
Unlike other erectile dysfunction problems – “grip of death” has very few “visible” symptoms. It becomes obvious when you're “going” for 40+ minutes and are near climax – with oral stimulation and even your own masturbation not really giving the required help.
The problem is not acute, and certainly a LOT more common than it used to be.
The cause – surprise, surprise – is technology; both from the Internet (unlimited porn) and the bombarding of people's perceptions of the “perfect” body from social media. If you suspect you're suffering from it, this tutorial aims to propose a solution.
A note on social media.
90% of social media is fake. It's wannabe's trying to pad their egos by showing off their shiny toys. Women use it to gain attention; men use it to try and get pretty girls interested in them. Whilst it can be used properly (and many do), the majority of social media usage is completely unnatural . This is the predominant cause of erectile dysfunction, typically in the past 5 years.
The reason SM is so dangerous – especially when it comes to sex – is that it puts across entirely UNREALISTIC expectations about what “normal” people look like. Sure, everyone has that celebrity crush they'd love to “spend time” with … but let's be 100% serious – they're a crush for a reason … they're the personification of what you feel the “perfect “partner would be. To expect that from someone else is a recipe for disaster. This is why many men are experiencing problems with their manhood.
If you use social media – use the “1/2 technique” – every time you consume something from a platform, make sure you post something about YOUR life to justify looking at it.
Some may not want to put pictures onto the Internet … that's their choice, and it should precede them from looking at social media anyway. Donald Trump's picture has been used across TV and the web for decades; it's not done him any harm. Do you really think a picture of “Bruce from the Dakota” is really going to be broadcast around the world or whatever? As long as you're vigilant, there should not be any major issues (unless you're acting like a troll).
Social media abuse is a real problem and causing MANY problems with the youth of today. Unrealistic expectations, feeling like they have to constantly perform, trying to “keep up” with a fantasy image of wealth / identity … it's all there in Twitter / Facebook etc.
As mentioned, the primary cause of retarded / delayed ejaculation is “grip of death”.
Grip of death is when you hold your penis so tight when you masturbate that it promises you from actually enjoying vaginal penetration.
That's not to say the “nerves” are damaged or anything; just that your brain stops recognizing the stimulation provided by the vagina. The result is that you no longer respond to your partner's body and are instead frustrated that you can not climax.
Whilst “grip of death” is almost always the cause of RD, it's not the underlying cause of the condition itself. The underlying cause is almost ALWAYS psychological (in the head) – typically over-masturbation because of stress or boredom.
It's easy to pin the blame on technology / social media – but the simple fact is that most men bring the condition upon themselves . Like overeating or alcoholism, over-masturbation has many untold side-effects from porn addiction to not wanting to engage with society. The effect of “delayed ejaculation” typically comes from the self-inferred psychological blocks put into the mind by the person themselves … NOT some arbitrary external factor.
In reality – what most people do not tell you – is that the majority of “addictions” or “dependencies” (especially if the subject is entirely unhealthy) are caused by boredom.
Boredom – and the prevalence of “filling the void” – lies at the core of many ills of the West. Masturbation is a free, quick and simple way to “feel good” for some time. Whilst it's generally considered natural to masturbate at least a couple of times a week (if you're not in a relationship), this token of consideration is often used to justify prolific bouts of jerking off multiple times per day.
The proliferation of this is not the problem – the problem is the way in which the man will typically “tighten the grip” in order to achieve orgasm. The ensuing problems arise because his partner is unable to replicate the same sensation.
The most important thing to appreciate about the problem is that you're NOT ALONE.
If you can ejaculate on your own, your body is working fine. The problem is almost certainly in the mind – which means that you have to understand how to “let go” and get back into a natural way of things.
This idea of being “natural” is the core of it all – and where the most potent “solution” comes from.
The best solution is to actually do something so big / drastic in your life that you have “no time” to concern yourself with porn / masturbation.
This goes beyond getting a hobby – it's about committing yourself to doing something so huge that you have to change the entire under way way your life works. Whether that's moving across country, creating a business or having some other “huge” project that allows you to get out of the rut you're likely in.
To do this, there are 3 steps which are typically seen as the most effective:
1) Identify “Why” You May Over-Masturbate / Over-Stimulate –
Again, the simple reason why the major of RE cases appear is because the man has been over-masturbating.
The key is understanding why .
Men are typically taught to contain their feelings / problems. If you feel like you're unable to talk to those around you about the issue – seek out a support group.
The point is that you're either stressed or bored . Of all the men I've talked to with the issue, boredom has been the cause.
You need to be 100% serious with yourself. Why are you turning to porn? Why are you ignoring the “natural” life and pursuing an Internet fantasy?
There's nothing “wrong” with doing it – it's just the reason why you're going that way. That's the important thing – appreciating what the void is.
Attaching the problem with a machete is not going to fix anything. You're likely 100% healthy – and just have a small social problem in the mind. Getting over that starts with admitting what you're missing from your life. That there's obviously something wrong.
2. Accept Masturbation IS NOT The Problem –
It's okay to masturbate … just not so vigorously.
The cause of RD is “grip of death”. If you're gripping so hard, it means you're masturbating too much.
Masturbation itself is healthy, as is sex. What is not is when you're using the pleasure derived from it to somehow fill a void in other areas of your life.
This means that if you're looking to “fix” the issue of delayed ejaculation, complete absence is likely going to be a problem. Like how many obese people try and stop eating altogether (and fail miserably), stopping masturbating is just going to push the problem onto something else (you'll start binge watching YouTube videos or something).
Masturbation IS NOT the problem. The problem is the “void” you're trying to fill with it.
I do not know what that void is for you. It could be that you have a stressful family situation, friends who are sick or some other problem … for most , it's utter and complete boredom. They have “nothing” to aim for life, and end up filling the void with bouts of masturbation and porn.
Once you get past the stigma most people attach to sex / masturbation, you'll begin to see the “true” picture. EMBRACE masturbation and sex … but do not use it as a crutch.
3. Do Something BOLD –
After you've considered the truth about masturbation (that it's actually healthy), you need to work on fixing the under problem.
As mentioned, for the majority of men – it's boredom. They're bored with life … with TV … with all the lies, let-downs and fake people. They're bored with the promises they were sold … and turned out to be lies. They're bored with their shitty job and want to just explore again.
This boredom has one remedy – doing something “bold”.
Now, it must be stated this is NOT to advocate doing anything overtly risky. That's not what I'm going to suggest … as – again – it pushes the “problem” onto something else.
The core problem you probably have is that you've lost the “lust” for life that you used to have. Like an orange, all the excitement of youth has been squeezed out of your existence – leaving bills, dependents and annoying relatives in its place.
There's no time for “you” any more, and you likely fill the void with the one thing that you can depend on to make you feel good.
The point is – and I've found this a lot – many men feel let down by those around them. They may have “grown” in stature / standing … but have found their partner or family are a link to follow suit.
In this case, and for the majority of other instances of “boredom”, the answer is to “invent” your own reality.
This sounds quirky, but it's 100% legit.
People can only react to what they see . They do not know you've had 2 hip replacements or can speak 15 languages … they see what you're wearing, how you hold yourself and what kind of things you talk about.
In our modern world – it's VERY easy to succumb to mediocrity – talking about “the weather” and other nonsense. No one cares anymore, and are so eager to try and “escape” that they barely talk to one another … about anything .
The good news is that if you're in this position, you can make the change quite simply.
- The first thing to do is go out and buy a legal set of clothes. Something tailor.
- After doing this, get some proper shoes. Nothing too expensive but they have to be decent.
- Once this is done, go out into the woods or some quiet place near to where you live.
- Go to some tree with a notepad and pen. Write down the one thing you'd do regularly if you had the opportunity to do so.
- Does not matter what it is … sleeping with a bunch of girls, creating great art, viewing all the wonders of the world.
- The key is that you've got to do that “one” thing forever . Constantly.
- Think about it barely enough to actually consider “doing” it … like if you were to do it, what would you do to get there?
- If you can actually break down the process (steps) to get to a particular place, you'll quickly discover that you do not actually need half the resources you assumed you would anyway.
- When this happens, you can begin to actually consider putting some of your ideas into action
This is where things start to get interesting.
Most people vegetate because they lack the motivation to go and enjoy themselves. Maybe they've given up on actually attaining something worthwhile, and instead try and fill the void with mindless drivel. Masturbation falls into that category.
The best people are not immune to this; they just make themselves so busy / productive that they do not give a damn about what “urges” they may have to contend with. This lies at the core of why some always seem to do well, and others generally plateau.
If you apply this process to the “RD” issue – the point is that if you take your mind away from “filling the void”, you will begin to experience a natural and organic response from your body.
This organic nature of the response is the core of the solution. 99.9% of our societies are now so fabricated, processed and fake that our bodies do not know what to do in response. You never hear of anyone becoming morbidly obese eating Broccoli, right? The same exists for sex – so many people (male and female) experience issues around intimacy due to the proliferation of porn. Whilst “porn” is not to blame, it highlights the main problem – a lack of natural indulgence leading to an inability to curtail any sort of false sensations.
If you want to get set right – stay away from pills and just cut back on the flickering lights of modern society. Go out and enjoy nature – go for walks, buy nice stuff or kick back with friends. If you're really adventurous, take a bold risk like moving across country. Do this enough and you'll always find most of your “problems” will just go away.